I’m an Introvert. Will Online Dating Work for Me?

Caroline from Ottawa asks:Online Dating Q&A

I’m a little bit of an introvert and normally shy by nature. My sister told me to sign up for a dating site. There are so many people on it and I don’t want to have to talk to everyone who messages me. I’m not sure how successful I’m going to be with online dating. What do you suggest I do?


In some ways online dating is built for the introverts; you have time to think about who you may be interested in and time to construct your conversations with them.  But that doesn’t make it the easiest thing to do.

There are some tricks to make it less overwhelming for those who feel like it’s all just too much.


  1. Create email filters for your site offers. Based on your email settings, emails from people who don’t match your criteria (be it age range, distance, etc.) will not populate in your general email box.
  2. Some sites offer one-click “no thanks” emails you can send to those you’re not interested in.
  3. While responding to every email is polite, it’s not necessary. Many accept that no response is the same response as ‘I’m not interested.’
  4. Practice makes perfect. Everything is overwhelming when it’s new. The way to feel masterful and confident at anything, be it tap dancing or online dating, is by just doing it. Once you start online dating you’ll understand the flow of it and it will be less intimidating.
  5. Make sure you do talk to someone. While there are tons of people on online dating sites, the truth is that you only need one. There are bound to be men/women you’re interested in on the dating site. Don’t let your nerves stop you from communicating with them. Take on one person at a time and see where it goes. Hopefully the one for you pops up sooner rather than later and you can get off online dating and into real life.

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