Talking to people is an art, and in today’s day and age with all the technology it’s almost becoming a lost art. Why would we need to learn how to skillfully talk to women when we have our phones we can hide behind, right?I mean, our phones have every app imaginable out there to chitchat on or through.
And whatever other ones you use to talk to people with. Either way, when it comes to holding a conversation with a chick you just met, there are a few things you shouldn’t do.
1.) Leaning In
Leaning in shows neediness, so if you can’t hear what she’s saying, stand there and put your finger behind your ear motioning that you can’t hear what she’s saying. She’ll naturally get closer to you, which makes it look like she’s into you.
2.) Having your back to the crowd/room
You want to be the one in the most comfortable position. So, if she’s at the bar and you’re behind her and you start chatting with her, try and position yourself up against the bar next to her for get her to switch places with you. A better one is to be sitting down on a barstool and have her standing there talking. Again, it makes it look like she’s more interested in the interaction.
Remember, when you’re talking to a woman, there are other women in the room noticing what you’re doing so you have to keep that in mind when you’re chatting and flirting. There’s definitely some psychology to “working the room.”
Now to the main part of this article…
3.) STOP ASKING QUESTIONS
When you’re talking to a girl, you don’t want to ask a million questions. Most guys will approach a girl and say things like, “How are you?” and once the girl responds with, “I’m good,” the guy will ask yet another question like, “So what are you out doing tonight?” After she replies with, “Nothing much, just hanging out,” the guy will ask ANOTHER question, “So you’re just out to be out?”
See where that’s going?! Question after question after question… that’s not a conversation, that’s an interview. Where’s the flirting or bantering in that?! There isn’t any!
Initially you can ask a question to START the conversation but once you get a response you want to tease or bust on what the girl says.
You: “So what are we celebrating tonight?” (My favorite conversation starter btw)
(I’ve heard every response to this so I have a comeback to anything that’s thrown at me.)
You: “What?!?! Life?! Best answer I’ve heard all night! Details though, you can’t give an answer like that without explaining why you’re out celebrating this thing called… LIFE.”
Girl: *Girl responds*
One major key to help avoid asking question after question is to turn your questions into STATEMENTS.
So instead of saying, “Are you from around here?” You can say, “You look like you’re not from around here.” Or instead of asking, “Are you a local?” You can say, “You’re too nice to be a local, you’re definitely from another city.”
When you make statements like that, you can be wrong but you’re not being the interview guy. Plus, if you are wrong they will more than likely correct you and tell you where they’re from if they’re interested in you.
You: “You look like you’re not from around here.”
Girl: *laughs* “I’ve lived in Anaheim my whole life.”
Now you just got some information of where she’s from by simply making a STATEMENT rather than asking a question.
After you find out whichever city she’s from BUST ON HER, “What?!?! Anaheim?! My mother doesn’t like me hanging out with criminals.”
So, again, learn how to turn your questions into statements and you will stand out among the rest of the corny cheesy guys asking the same thing over and over to every girl in the bar.
Stay up, you dating beast you!
Lavalife.com is one of the original players in the online dating game. Committed to helping its members find fun dates and relationships, Lavalife is a prime source for online dating, dating and relationship advice.