I Feel Awkward Around my Younger Girlfriend’s Friends. Help!

Question: John from Port Hope asks…Lava365 Ask the Expert

I’m dating a younger woman (I’m 38, she’s 26) and lately I’ve been feeling like the old creepy guy when hanging out with her friends. I don’t get a lot of their jokes even though we’re not THAT far apart in age. We really connect, but I know it’s important for her to be able to bring her boyfriend around her friends. What can I do to make it easier?


John,

I have two bits of advice for you here:

1)     Confidence is Key!

If you don’t feel that you are a special, quality man then nobody else will either. Stop worrying about age and start thinking about what makes you awesome.

Your girlfriend is dating you for a reason (in fact, many reasons). It’s because she sees something special in you. When you let yourself feel nervous or less-than-confident around her friends, you’ll be opening yourself up to receive less respect from them. If you feel comfortable dating her then you should feel comfortable being around other people her age, too.

2)    Befriend Her Friends

With this in mind, no matter whom you’re dating, it’s super important that you befriend her friends. The best way to do this is to ignore the jokes you don’t understand and to start to connect with her friends on other levels that you do understand. 26 and 38 are really not too far apart. You are all adults and I’m sure there are lots of things to talk about.

Try and be more social when you’re around her friends and make a bigger effort to get to know them. Just because you feel uncomfortable around her friends that doesn’t mean THEY do. Age is just a number. Maturity is what counts.

Good luck!

 

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