How to Build Confidence and Wow Your Guy

confidence2“Once we believe in ourselves, we can risk curiosity, wonder, spontaneous delight, or any experience that reveals the human spirit.” – E.E. Cummings

Ladies, a lack of self-confidence as you delve into more mature age groups is often something we all deal with in some form or another. Whether it’s keeping you from living life to the fullest or keeping others from getting to know the real you, it can be detrimental for relationships and self-development.

So to all the women who are figuring out themselves during their thirties, forties and beyond,…. here are some tips to help you attain self-confidence and “wow” the man in your life.

1. Draw Attention to Your Strengths

By the time you reach your thirties, you have a pretty good idea of what makes up your strengths and your weaknesses. If you love your eyes, play them up with makeup. If you are crazy about your toned legs, wear skirts to show them off. Once you accept the fact that no one is “perfect” in every aspect, you can start to hone in on the things you are proud of.

Take the time to get to know yourself so you can really play up your strengths.  Guys love a confident woman and they can focus on the things you are proud of and really feed off your energy.  So find ways to play up those assets and ensure your energy is positive cause that is what trumps any areas your believe are your weaknesses.

2. Surround Yourself with People Who Make You Feel Good

A large part of feeling confident is being able to be completely comfortable around whomever you’re with. If you know that certain people are constantly putting you down for one thing or another, it may be time to part ways and seek the company of those who accept you and make you feel good about yourself.   This sometimes means you have to cleanse the relationships in your life.

You may at times need to distance yourself from some family members or start prioritizing your friends and filter through your networks.  Ensure that the minutes and hours in your day are with those that build up who you are and not around those that break you down and instill insecurities in your mind and spirit.

 3. Think Positive, and Act Positive

 Ever heard the phrase: “fake it till you make it”? Condition yourself to think positively, and your actions will soon follow. Every time your mind wanders into negative territory, pause and acknowledge what you are doing. Then, when you are able to effectively catch yourself, try replacing these negative thoughts with positive ones. Try taking it one step further and writing down all your positive traits. By doing this you will be accepting that it’s okay to be proud of your strengths and that when you are able to accept and celebrate these, others will too.

5.  Avoid perfectionism

No one is perfect, and constantly trying to measure yourself on this unachievable scale will lead to disappointment time and time again. This also means you need to stop comparing yourself to others. Realize that your flaws are part of what makes you who you are and that they are the reason the people in your life have chosen you to be in theirs. We are all unique individuals; accept your uniqueness and think of your flaws as the puzzle pieces that led you to fit with your current partner.

Always remember, confidence is something that comes from within. If you’re looking to find validation from your relationship, then you’re looking in the wrong place. You should be able to maintain your confidence whether you’re just starting out in a relationship, you’re five years in, or you’re newly single. As soon as you realize that confidence is not about impressing anyone else but about accepting yourself unconditionally, you will achieve the true self-confidence needed to wow any man.

Lavalife About Lavalife is one of the original players in the online dating game. Committed to helping its members find fun dates and relationships, Lavalife is a prime source for online dating, dating and relationship advice.

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