Whether it takes you a nerve-wracking couple of hours to prepare – or you just throw yourself together – you need to remember that a first date is not a major life event. Sure, you could be meeting the love of your life but more likely you are not. From my experience and from the thousands of singles that have shared their dating stories with me, the avid dater in search of a “keeper” will go on many first dates! Better to relax and enjoy the ride. Be sure to also read up on our first date do’s and don’ts.
Tip 1 – Have fun and smile a lot!
The first rule of thumb is to always have a positive attitude and to have fun in every situation. Smiles are contagious, and men often comment about a woman’s smile. It is a very attractive quality for men, because it all boils down to what makes him feel good. Ladies: Knowing that a smile is important, I would do whatever I could to highlight and showcase that beautiful smile. Great oral hygiene is a must! I would absolutely recommend teeth whitening for women who smoke. There is nothing less attractive than staring into someone’s mouth and noticing discolored teeth or smelling bad breath.
Tip 2 – Show confidence
All of our dating research identifies feeling good about yourself, being confident and comfortable in the dating arena as highly important. You can build confidence by working on the skills and areas you need to improve. Maybe you are a bit shy and need to work on better communication skills or asking more questions. It could be that you talk too much and have to learn to be quiet and avoid interrupting. As a woman who is full of ideas and used to doing a lot of talking, that’s something I am constantly working on. Genuinely feeling good about yourself means that you are doing all the things that make you feel good, and you can’t be attractive to a man when your own self-worth needs improvement.
Tip 3 – Feel pretty
Men are very visual creatures and they like feminine women. It’s always safer to select an outfit that leans towards a “feminine and fun” look rather than one that’s too conservative or overtly sexual. You don’t have to expose everything on your first date to make him interested, and a lot of men have confessed how they undress women and imagine what’s under their clothes. It makes it more mysterious and exciting.
If you take the time to feel pretty, men will appreciate that and notice you for making the effort. Be cautious not to drown yourself in strong perfume as some people have allergies or are put off by certain scents. Maybe you want to treat yourself to a new lipstick or lip gloss or buy a new mascara to highlight those beautiful eyes! Wearing the right amount of makeup is important to making a good impression on your first date as well. Ask a beauty consultant at your local drug store or department store for tips on colors that match your skin tone and personality.
Tip 4 – Relax
Lots of women admit to being very nervous before a date. They tend to be even more anxious if it has been a long time since they’ve been on a date or if it’s a date with someone they’re very excited about. Try not to set yourself up for failure and keep your expectations in check. A great way to relax before a date is to do something stress-relieving. Depending on the time of the date, you may want to go to the gym or treat yourself to a manicure and pedicure. Schedule a massage or relax at home and read a self-help book. Listen to some calm music or do some yoga.
The intention is to not overwhelm yourself playing out the date, planning everything you are going to say and do like it’s dress rehearsal for opening night. Be as comfortable and natural as possible. Don’t try to take on too many extra things before date night. Only do activities that are fun and stress-free to invite relaxation.
Tip 5 – Don’t talk too much
Ladies: first dates are not counseling sessions. He’ll think you have a loose screw if you spill the beans too soon. Do not engage in deep relationship conversation or anything negative for your first date! Keep it light, keep your focus on asking great questions and taking an interest in what your date likes. Men love attention. Be a better listener than storyteller.
Dating can be a fun and rewarding experience if you allow it to be. Appreciate the opportunities and take each date as chance to practice becoming a better dater and more attractive person. That way, you will be on your way to finding, meeting and keeping the one!
Lavalife.com is one of the original players in the online dating game. Committed to helping its members find fun dates and relationships, Lavalife is a prime source for online dating, dating and relationship advice.