Feel like your relationship has fallen flat? Can’t seem to put your finger on any one issue but it just feels like something is amiss between you and your flame?
If so, you may be in the middle of a relationship slump. Don’t panic. Don’t pull the plug. Funks can be fixed by simply razzing up the routine a bit. Here are five suggestions to help you beat boredom and boost your bond.
After being a couple for some time, complacency can distract us from making the effort to go out on official dates. Think back to the beginning of your partnership. Remember all of the sassy and spontaneous outings you came up with? Whatever happened to hang-gliding and karaoke-wing nights? You got too darn comfortable, that’s what.
Shake it up a bit. Instead of fazing out in front of a flick on the boob tube, surprise him with two tickets to a movie at the drive-in. Instead of heading to your local for yet another pint of stout, escort her to a just-opened lounge that’s the talk about town.
2. Take a Talk on the Wild Side
Conversations aren’t immune from routine. Chit-chatting about your day and gossiping about mutual acquaintances — “Can you believe Dylan has a third nipple?” — is fine, but there must be more gritty gab to your pairing than such surface communication. Try exploring topics you’re both interested in — politics, travel, philosophy, circus arts — then really dig in.
Consider reading up on possible topics so you can add meaningfully to the conversation. Thought-provoking trysts (see point #1) also lead to stimulating talkfests, as in gabbing about the erotic art exhibit you visited the other day rather than how wasted you both were last night.
Break up the everyday with a little unexpected gesture now and again. It could be a surprise gift — “Happy Wednesday!” — say, truffles, a homemade card or an old edition of a book by their fave author. Out-of-the-blue gift-giving turns an ordinary day into something special. The wow factor applies to activities too, not just material matters.
Take them on an unanticipated outing to visit a flea market, shoot some stick, enjoy High Tea, or anywhere else you flirtatiously fancy.
4. Sharing is Fun
Look into weekly activities and classes that interest you both. Maybe it’s joining a co-ed soccer team at your local sports club, enrolling in a pottery course (think: Ghost) or taking sushi prep instruction. Learning new things and sharing novel experiences not only enrich your daily routines, they also bring couples closer together — a surefire way to break beyond the blahs.
5. Spice up Your Sex Life
A new position, a titillating toy, randy role-playing, erotic massage — exploring new ground in the bedroom is one key to a healthy relationship, and it’s part of the mutual exploration that drew you to one another in the first place. Don’t forget to throw in new venues or times of day to add variety to your sexual routine.
Do it on the kitchen counter if you’re a bedroom-only couple or pull them into an alley when you’re walking back from the bar, come home for a brunch-munch or start the day with a breakfast-quickie. Let your wicked imagination go wild.