4 Ways to Tell Your Casual Relationship is Something More

couple playing video games

 

So, the guy you thought was just your “friend” is maybe kinda sorta turning into something more?

But you’re just not sure! Here’s how to know if he really IS into you in a romantic way, and how to know if you should be open to … more.

 

1. He checks in with you, showing that he cares about the things that matter to you.  He sends a text message to see how the scary meeting with your boss was for you, how your mama’s surgery went, if your headache is better, or even how your workout was.

2. He shows his “provider-protector” feathers – he picks up more than his share of the tabs when you go out together, he opens the door for you, he makes sure you get to your car safely when you leave the restaurant, the bar or the party. He shows that he wants to take care of you – which is natural for The Guy, even in a world where women too often “rob” the guy of this experience by being the I-can-do-it-myself girl.

3. He’s focused on you. Whereas girls are the queens of multi-tasking (we can fix dinner, do laundry, help a kid with homework, and be on a conference call at the same time) Guys are single focused – literally. Have you ever tried to get a question answered while “the game” was on? If this guy is texting you, calling you, Facebooking you, especially early in the morning or late in the evening, when he’s thinking about things that matter…then…you’re likely more than just a friend to him.  He’s not texting his frat brother or work buddy, now is he?

4. You’re no longer looking at other guys at clubs or bars…you tend to be happy hanging with him.
He’s initiating… he’s suggesting the next meeting, he’s looking to extend your time together, like a good friend should, but it’s more… and you know it is. So if he has many of the qualities that you admire and appreciate, how nice would it be to have a lover / partner who really and truly is your friend?  Sounds to me like a good place to be.

You’re noticing that things are getting more physical, and it’s OK with you both, and there’s tension – that romantic tension. You know it when you feel it. Chances are, this guy has had The Hots for you for a while, as men rarely develop physical attraction over time (See the movie When Harry Met Sally.) We women, on the other hand, we can and do develop The Hots over time, especially when we all of a sudden recognize that we feel good (pretty, safe, valued, “gotten”) when we’re with this particular man.

If you do in fact feel good when you’re with this man, if you are your best self when you’re with him, then… oh my… this is a man to pay attention to.

About Julie Ferman

Julie Ferman
Julie Ferman is the founder and CEO of Julie Ferman Associates, LLC. As a dating coach, media personality, professional speaker, dating industry consultant and events producer, her mission is to dignify and simplify the love search process for selective, relationship-minded professionals.
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